Unleash Your Inner Safety Goddess
By Britt Michaelian, M.A.
Author of Secrets of the Safety Goddess:
A Modern Safety Guide for Busy Parents
Doesn't it just sound euphoric to think about unleashing your inner goddess? How about unleashing your inner Safety Goddess? Ok, well maybe not as euphoric, but still a pretty enticing idea, right?
Today, you are going to find out 5 things you can do to tap into your inner Safety Goddess. The good news is that she is inside every one of us, if we choose to tap into her. The trick is knowing how...
When a mother takes home her first baby from the hospital, she is sent home with some diapers, a blanket and usually a bag of goodies with such things as a sample of baby shampoo, a tube of diaper rash ointment and coupons for diapers.
Unfortunately, there is no instruction book that comes home with our new baby because every baby is different. If you are lucky, you may have a very hands-on grandmother to help you manage your little one. However, the reality is that no matter how much mother's intuition you are blessed with and no matter how wonderful a caregiver you can possibly be, safety knowledge is not something we are born with. It is learned. So, educating yourself about child safety now is essential.
With the #1 cause of death in children being preventable injuries, it is our job as loving parents to educate ourselves about potential hazards, safety precautions and preferred actions to take in an emergency, if we want to keep our little bambinos safe!
Here are 5 steps you can take right now to tap into safety bliss:
Safety Goddesses, unleash!
1. Take annual CPR and First Aid courses through the American Red Cross or the American Heart Association.
2. Childproof your child and your home. Make sure that your windows have guards and locks, safety gates are installed at stairways, electrical outlets are covered, chemicals and cosmetics are out of reach and all other hazards are corrected. Communicate with your child about things that are dangerous and use protective gear and helmets when participating in wheeled activities.
3. Install, test and utilize your smoke and carbon monoxide detectors on every level of your home.
4. Supervise your children with the 5/10 rule: Never let a child under 5 out of your site for longer than 5 seconds and never let a child be more than 10 feet away from you. Expand the time to 10/20 for children between 5 and 9 years old. Supervision is essential for children of all ages!
5. Read child safety books, watch safety videos and regularly educate yourself with the latest recall information and safety news.
Speaking from experience, once I started reading about child safety, I got addicted. There is simply no end to the information you can find that will help you be a prepared and informed caregiver. Safety is a topic that you can never know too much about because the world is always changing, which means safety is too!
Now that you have let your inner Safety Goddess out to play, tap into safety at least once a month. Sign up for my Safety Pop newsletter, check out the Consumer Product Safety Commission Recall list, test your smoke and carbon monoxide detectors and sign up for those CPR classes.
Then, keep the ball rolling on safety. Start with you and move on to your community. One great way to promote safety is to pass it along as a gift. For under $20, you can purchase a copy of Secrets of the Safety Goddess: A Modern Safety Guide for Busy Parents or Care for Kids: The Essential Guide to Preparing Caregivers on Amazon.com and give a meaningful gift to a parent, teacher or nanny. If we can spread the message about the Safety Goddess to all of our fellow parents and caregivers, our children will be safer at playdates, school and in life. Now that sounds euphoric!
To find out more about child safety, go to http://SafetyGoddess.com and http://ResponsibleFamily.com
Friday, December 19, 2008
Monday, December 08, 2008
Year End Bonus?
As 2008 draws to a close many things are on our to do lists. Gift to buy, parties to go to, thanks to many who make our lives manageable. Your child's caregivers and teachers are probably on that list. But this year, with the economy so uncertain, you may find you are cutting back on those year end envelopes of joy.
Nannies- that is to be a little bit expected. But that doesn't lessen the sting. Much like the dad in the Christmas Vacation movie, many of us expect that holiday bonus. We count on it especially if we have been with a family for more than a year and have gotten a bonus in years past. And in these stressful times, a nanny is often working late, filling in when needed and offering to help out more than normal. When the holiday envelope doesn't arrive, or is less than expected, hurt feelings can ruin what has been a great thing for everyone.
SO what are you to do? My advice is to remember what a difference a nanny can make in your life and remember that communication is key. If you want to keep a great nanny, you should really make it a priority to show your appreciation. If you are cutting back across the board on all holiday spending, let your nanny know. Explain that these sacrifices must be made but you would like to show your appreciation in another way. Offer and extra day off, a few late mornings that you can calendar throughout the year, some frequent flier miles, or other bonuses that don't cost you much but will make a big differences to the nanny. Show that age old mantra we preach to the kids is true, it is the thought that counts. Find a creative way to show that you care. Most of all don't be afraid to talk to each other. If you can find a way to discuss these touchy subjects, it will make all the difference in how you weather these tough times.
The toughest part of this is how we, as nannies react. It can be almost impossible to not notice that they are spending tens of thousands of dollars on expensive gifts but then ask you to not take a bonus. And all too often we are counting on the bonus to pay for our traveling or gifts for this season instead of it being a true "bonus". Talk to your family and let them know how you feel. Don't let resentment or anger build. And remember, unless it is written in your contract, a end of the year bonus is not promised, even if you have gotten one before. When you do get a bonus, make sure to appreciate that this year, more than ever, it really means a lot!
Sue Downey
Saturday, November 08, 2008
Why nanny care IS an affordable choice for some
With the economy crashing and people tightening belts, much has been made about the fact that nanny care is expensive. And it is. It is certainly more than putting one baby in day care. However, for some families nanny care is truly a value. If a family has 3 kids in day care, a nanny can actually be less expensive. And the care happens in your home, with no commute to a center before and after work. Flexibility is a crucial advantage of nanny care. Many working parents work long hours, often racing to gather kids as centers close. Also, coming home to kids as opposed to picking them up can make all the difference for moms and dads who look forward all day to spending time with their children. In today's economy many professionals work non traditional hours, making nanny care essential. In addition, nannies often lighten the load around the home. Most nannies are willing to help with a few non child related tasks, shopping, starting dinner, picking up dry cleaning etc..
Certainly, nanny care is not for everyone. But I hope that today's parents don't discount the option and the many benefits just because some think the price tag is high. I know plenty of moms who come home to dinner on the stove, kids coloring quietly and a friendly smile from someone who just wants to make life easier for the family. It is hard to put a price tag on that in any economy.
Sue Downey
Thursday, November 06, 2008
Is the economy affecting nannies and daycare centers?
I have to believe that, with a resounding Yes, they are. Childcare is probably one of the most expensive costs to families, and I have to think that especially for nanny care, which sometimes comes with the added expense of healthcare, mileage and gas money, and extras that are provided to nannies.
And another cost of nannies, which parents seem to slowly be catching onto? Household-employment taxes. People who pay household workers more than $1,600 a year are required to file the necessary paperwork, consisting of Medicare and Social Security taxes, unemployment insurance - federal and state - and other state and local taxes, and this is often a tedious process. But by escaping these taxes, some nannies may be losing out on services and a safety net, according to an article in the Wall Street Journal today about parents avoiding "the nanny tax." The cause of this is due, in part anyway, to huge growth of parents hiring nannies from internet sites. From the article:
In the past, parents more often hired full-time nannies through brick-and-mortar agencies, which often exerted armtwisting to persuade both parents and nannies to pay taxes...An estimated 30% to 50% of nanny hires are now done online, up from about 10% five years ago. In general, that may lead to "doing things a little more casually," says Monica Fleming, president of GoNannies.com, an employment site.
So it would seem that while using the internet to obtain a great, trusting nanny would be convienent and safe in today's world, it might actually be allowing for less tax revenue and a safety net for the nanny?
What do you think of this? How do you think nannies and/or childcare centers have been or will be affected by the economy?
And another cost of nannies, which parents seem to slowly be catching onto? Household-employment taxes. People who pay household workers more than $1,600 a year are required to file the necessary paperwork, consisting of Medicare and Social Security taxes, unemployment insurance - federal and state - and other state and local taxes, and this is often a tedious process. But by escaping these taxes, some nannies may be losing out on services and a safety net, according to an article in the Wall Street Journal today about parents avoiding "the nanny tax." The cause of this is due, in part anyway, to huge growth of parents hiring nannies from internet sites. From the article:
In the past, parents more often hired full-time nannies through brick-and-mortar agencies, which often exerted armtwisting to persuade both parents and nannies to pay taxes...An estimated 30% to 50% of nanny hires are now done online, up from about 10% five years ago. In general, that may lead to "doing things a little more casually," says Monica Fleming, president of GoNannies.com, an employment site.
So it would seem that while using the internet to obtain a great, trusting nanny would be convienent and safe in today's world, it might actually be allowing for less tax revenue and a safety net for the nanny?
What do you think of this? How do you think nannies and/or childcare centers have been or will be affected by the economy?
-Katie Conrad
Monday, November 03, 2008
New book helps to keep kids safe!

At Nannypalooza this year we were very honored to have New York City child abuse and sex crimes prosecutor Jill Starishevsky come and speak to us. She also owns the website How'sMyNanny.com. Jill's mission in life is keeping kids safe, and specifically she wants to keep children safe from sexual predators. I learned quite a few things in her presentation, not the least of which was to never teach a child to keep "secrets" as this is the first thing a predator will use as a way to keep the abuse silent. (Use the word surprise instead.)
Jill recently published a new, groundbreaking book that I believe will save kids' lives. It is called My Body Belongs to Me. This book is a poem that will help start the conversation about personal safety. It is very brave and amazing. The one part of the book that is very specific about abuse, that very gently, but very clearly explains to a child that it is not ok for someone to touch you in places your swimsuit covers, was the part of the book that publishers wanted her to change or delete. But Jill knows from her dedicated work with the city of New York that keeping kids in the dark will not protect them. Keeping secrets is not good for anyone when it comes to abuse.
Friday, October 31, 2008
NANC in the news
Nannypalooza got a mention on the Today Show on Oct. 30th. Watch the story here!
The story is about affordable child care and parent's search for "Mary Poppins"
The story is about affordable child care and parent's search for "Mary Poppins"
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Niche Nannies
A Niche Nanny is a nanny who specializes in a type of care that is specific. For example, there are infant specialists who care for newborns. These nannies have special training, years of experience and a special talent for dealing with newborns and their parents. Infant Specialists often spend 24/7 with a family for the first few weeks of a baby's life in order to provide the best care for the whole family. There are many kinds of niche nannies. Nannies who specialize in care for autistic or special needs families for example. These nannies also have a wealth of training and experience. But even if your needs are more basic finding a nanny that has experience with twins, or a nanny who has experience dealing with divorce can make all the difference for you.
This trend is great for nannies as it allows them to market themselves to families and makes them more employable. It also allows them to command higher salaries. It is great for families as it offers up nannies with more training and specialized knowledge that will help them meet their specific needs.
The thing about any nanny situation is that it is most successful when the nanny and family have a good fit. When the nanny and family match needs, talents, temperaments, and personalities. In that sense every nanny is looking for his or her "niche".
Sue Downey
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Economic hard times for nannies
The news is hitting everyone. The economy is bad and things are tough. For nannies, whose income is tied to the income of others (the more a family makes the more they can afford to pay for childcare) the situation is not looking good. Recently there was this article in the Wall Street Journal Five Ways to Save on Child-Care Costs - WSJ.com. This article suggest nanny sharing as one way to get high quality care while not taking out a second mortgage on your home. It also talks about how to handle it if you have to cut your nanny's salary.
As a nanny who has worked for a family for more than 7 years I can't imagine what that conversation will feel like. "Yes, I need you to do the same job, work the same hours, and get paid less." However, my employer works in the financial industry and she is probably going to make less this year. She is working just as hard and just as many hours if not more! So I started thinking about it and here is how I would like the conversation to go.
1. If you have to pay me less, or even give me less for bonuses and extras please tell me about it. Talking about these things is awkward but it does make it better in the long run.
2. Make me a part of the team. If I know you are cutting corners then it will be easier for me to take the hit.
3. If I am loyal now and take the pay cut with grace and dignity, please remember me later when things get better.
4. If you have to cut back think of things you can do for your nanny that will help her weather the storm. Do you have internet she can use? Can you share frequent flier miles, credit card bonus points, or other perks that don't cost you a thing but that can mean everything to someone who may be living check to check? These things show that you care. And really that is what is important to convey.
Sue Downey (nanny)
Monday, October 20, 2008
Contracts between nannies and families
Should nannies and families sign contracts? Do you think they help in spelling out responsibilities and rules? Do they help with issues that may be brought up later - as in, just refer to the contract you've signed to work out a problem? Or should nannies and families play it by ear, see how things go and adjust as necessary?
I worked as a nanny for 1.5 years, and never signed a contract with the family. I was under the impression that we would sign one upon my starting, but it never happened. I never really thought much about it, because we had a great system going, and any issues that came up were addressed immediately. However, there was one important contract we both signed through the agency, and we didn't realize until months later the real problem with that.
The family used an agency to find me, and one day the mom and I were talking about that agency, and apparently we both got very different definitions of our "contract" from them. See, I was aware of a contract through the agency that found me, and I signed it because it was spelled out to me. The rule of that contract was that I was not to open a business like the nanny agency within 150 miles of her business. That was a very easy contract to sign as I knew that would never be an issue. The mom of the family I cared for was under the impression that the contract she and I both signed separately stated that I, as the nanny, would be responsible for paying the family's fee if I backed out of the position before our agreed-upon 1 year agreement was up.
While this never became an issue between the family and myself, as I stayed with them for longer than a year, it definitely clarified the use of contracts...MAKE SURE YOU BOTH SIGN THE SAME AGREEMENT!
Katie Conrad
I worked as a nanny for 1.5 years, and never signed a contract with the family. I was under the impression that we would sign one upon my starting, but it never happened. I never really thought much about it, because we had a great system going, and any issues that came up were addressed immediately. However, there was one important contract we both signed through the agency, and we didn't realize until months later the real problem with that.
The family used an agency to find me, and one day the mom and I were talking about that agency, and apparently we both got very different definitions of our "contract" from them. See, I was aware of a contract through the agency that found me, and I signed it because it was spelled out to me. The rule of that contract was that I was not to open a business like the nanny agency within 150 miles of her business. That was a very easy contract to sign as I knew that would never be an issue. The mom of the family I cared for was under the impression that the contract she and I both signed separately stated that I, as the nanny, would be responsible for paying the family's fee if I backed out of the position before our agreed-upon 1 year agreement was up.
While this never became an issue between the family and myself, as I stayed with them for longer than a year, it definitely clarified the use of contracts...MAKE SURE YOU BOTH SIGN THE SAME AGREEMENT!
Katie Conrad
Monday, October 13, 2008
Nannypalooza
Last weekend, Oct 4 and 5th, we held our third conference Nannypalooza. The idea behind this conference was to create a place where nannies of all levels could come and get training at an affordable price. AND that it could be fun and professional all at the same time.
As nannies we know that by making learning fun more can be accomplished. Nannies are often very isolated in their positions. They can feel like they have little support and depending on their relationship with their employers, it is possible that they don't have any support. Bringing nannies together from all skill levels and from all geographic areas is so important for so many reasons. Supporting each other is one of the most crucial.
The conference was once again a huge success, bringing together nannies of every level and agencies of every size to meet each other and learn. The sessions were overall very well received and the atmosphere was fun and welcoming.
Next year we are looking to move the conference from the Philly area to another location. I hope we can continue to bring high quality content to nannies and agencies while having a good time.
Posted by Sue Downey
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
The Nanny-Mother Relationship
Should a nanny be a part of the family or should she/he remain stricty business?
I have heard both ends of the spectrum on this issue. I had the pleasure of being immediately accepted as family when I first came to nanny. I was grateful for this because I was 1,200 miles from home and a little nervous. The family was very accommodating, allowing me to put my favored foods onto the grocery list and occassional personal items if necessary. I was also given gas money weekly, and wherever I took the kids I was given money or re-imbursed. The mother of the 3 fabulous kids also helped me find a doctor, dentist, pharmacist, and helped me switch my car and health insurance policies.
I worked for a very laid-back family, where it was even acceptable for me to take personal calls at the house or on my cell phone. I was given time to run errands during the business day if necessary, and occassionally a friend stopped by to play with the kids, or to pick up a forgotten item.
I cannot complain about the environment in which I worked. Actually, the fact that it was so laid back made me want to NOT endulge in those opportunities out of respect. I rarely accepted personal calls, unless from family, and I tried to make doctors and hair appointments on my day off or early in the morning. In the very beginning, when I did not know a soul in my new town, on my days off I would take the kids with me to discover the town. Our relationship worked very well because everything was laid out in the beginning. I did my job, and thus few problems occurred. I still have a great relationship with the family for which I nannied, including the parents.
I have heard of some rough stories. And really, the media (remember The Nanny Diaries?) likes to play on the bad relationships between mothers and nannies. I think that if both parties really just concentrate on their number one priority - the children - the relationship works, whatever way it naturally flows. I have also heard, and I do think it is a common belief that there is a complete lack of communication between mothers and nannies, which can lead to jealousy and resentment.
What has been your experience? And is the media portrayal correct? How can mothers and nannies overcome problems?
-- Katie Conrad
Wednesday, August 06, 2008
Nannies and Sick Days
Should nannies have paid sick days?
Most employees do, why shouldn't nannies? Isn't it pretty likely that nannies who get sick got it from one of the little ones? And if they didn't, who do you think will get it next? Nannies are employees too, and they do deserve sick days.
I saw a post awhile back on The Juggle, a Wall Street Journal blog about Nannies/Caregivers and paid sick days, and it really got me thinking. Most nannies, when using sick days, are truly sick and need the day off. I don't know that many nannies, but I don't image it's very common for nannies to abuse sick time. (Correct me if i'm wrong.) If they are abusing it, they should not be your nanny.
I don't remember how many sick days I used - one? two? - but I was certainly offered them, especially one time upon returning from the doctor's office and I was told to take a sick day (I must have looked pretty bad!) I just really think it is the right think to do - paid sick days should be available to everyone. Especially childcare providers.
Interestingly, out of over 60 comments on that post I read, only 3 comments came from nannies or former nannies. The rest were from parents who employ nannies, most of whom stated that they offer paid sick time in addition to decent salary and in some cases, vacation time. But I've heard some stories of nannies not being treated well at all.
Here is a link to the article- wall_street_journal_blog
Nannies, sound off.
---Katie Conrad
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
The Joys of Being a Nanny
The Joys of Being a Nanny
- When you are supervising homework time and she finally says, "I DID IT!" and beams as she shows you her work.
- When they were asked to draw a picture of the family and you are included in the drawing. (How sweet, right?)
- When you go to the driving range at the golf course and the kids are so much better than you that you don't have to try to let them win!
- When they leave you notes under your bedroom door because they missed you overnight.
- When they make an egg breakfast for you! And it tastes delicious!
- When they are able to show you how the science experiment works!
- When you take them trick-or-treating and after going through their stash of candy say, "you can have this Reese's Cup, I know they are your favorite" and you know that they will never have a problem sharing.
- When you walk in on them reading a book to their little sister and making the animal sounds in the book!
- When asked "what did you learn in school today?" and they say anything other than "nothing." **
- When they come home from school with an A+ test and thank you for helping them study.
-When you tuck them in at night and they give you a kiss and say they love you!
** Nannies, if you don't already, ask your charges "what did you learn in school today?" after school each day. I found that it makes them think about what they did and gets them talking about school after the bell rings. Most of the time they will remember this stuff too, so you are helping them retain their knowledge.
What are your joys of being a nanny?
--Katie Conrad
Sunday, July 27, 2008
New Kid on the Block!
New Kid on the Block!
Let me begin by saying that I am not a veteran nanny. I have 2 years experience as an actual nanny, but over 12 years of experience in childcare - babysitting, coaching, tutoring, mentoring - and that by no means qualifies me as an expert.
I do however, think it qualifies me to lead discussions on nannies and nanny experiences. When I was asked the common question "so, what do you do?" and my response was "I'm a nanny," I rarely got anything else. I think people thought that by being a nanny I didn't have experience in any other field, or that I couldn't hold a conversation with someone who works outside the home. Has anyone else felt that they were instantly judged for being a nanny, as opposed to just being a babysitter? It is my hope that we can shed some light on being a nanny, sharing our experiences and concerns, and in the process, emphasize the important role of a nanny, and the lasting impact they leave on children and families.
My nanny job was quite rare in that I cared for 2 elementary aged kids and one toddler with a severe disability. A disability that produces daily seizures. One that has not given her the ability to walk or talk. One that gave her severe acid reflux and minimal motor skills, so she now eats via feeding tube. One that has left her with cortical vision impairment, meaning no one knows what or how much she can actually see. But still, she was the cutest little girl in the world, and she taught me a few things.
-- Posted by our new blog guru- Katie
Friday, December 07, 2007
Nanny Holiday Tipping/Gifting
Every year experts weigh in on what to do for those people in your life who care for your children. It is a tricky business for some, when a nanny is really part of your family but she is also an employee. Here are some great ideas!
1. Give her a small percentage of your holiday bonus. An employer once told me that she couldn't have earned this bonus without me and so she shared it with me. The words meant as much as the money- but nothing says love quite the same as cold hard cash!
2. Give her an extra week's pay.
3. Make sure the kids make something for your nanny. Or have a special picture of the nanny and kids framed. Make a video of the kids talking to you about the nanny and all the nice things she does for your family. Every mom treasures those homemade gifts and the nanny does too.
4. Give her a day or two off around the holidays - don't count it against her vacation.
5. Really think about your nanny's interests and hobbies. I would rather have something meaningful to me than an expensive piece of jewelry that I will never wear.
6. Give her the use of your vacation home or frequent flier miles! She won't care that you didn't spend a time- everyone loves to travel.
7. If you aren't sure what to get- give a gift card or cash. There are loads of stories in the nanny world of thoughtless gifts that employers gave the nanny. I don't think families mean to do this- but if you can't think of something that really seems to be special- give a gift card with a personal note of thanks.
It all really boils down to this, nannies want to be thanked and appreciated. They don't stay in this profession for the money, they do it because they love the kids and they are good at helping out the family. Make sure you take the time in this season to let them know you care about them.
1. Give her a small percentage of your holiday bonus. An employer once told me that she couldn't have earned this bonus without me and so she shared it with me. The words meant as much as the money- but nothing says love quite the same as cold hard cash!
2. Give her an extra week's pay.
3. Make sure the kids make something for your nanny. Or have a special picture of the nanny and kids framed. Make a video of the kids talking to you about the nanny and all the nice things she does for your family. Every mom treasures those homemade gifts and the nanny does too.
4. Give her a day or two off around the holidays - don't count it against her vacation.
5. Really think about your nanny's interests and hobbies. I would rather have something meaningful to me than an expensive piece of jewelry that I will never wear.
6. Give her the use of your vacation home or frequent flier miles! She won't care that you didn't spend a time- everyone loves to travel.
7. If you aren't sure what to get- give a gift card or cash. There are loads of stories in the nanny world of thoughtless gifts that employers gave the nanny. I don't think families mean to do this- but if you can't think of something that really seems to be special- give a gift card with a personal note of thanks.
It all really boils down to this, nannies want to be thanked and appreciated. They don't stay in this profession for the money, they do it because they love the kids and they are good at helping out the family. Make sure you take the time in this season to let them know you care about them.
Friday, November 09, 2007
What do I LOOK FOR IN A FAMILY- a nanny's view
There are an awful lot of posts and articles out there for families about what to look for in a nanny. But the real truth of the matter is that there are far more families looking for nannies than the other way around. Nannies, when you go on an interview you should be interviewing the family while they are interviewing you! It is essential that you find a family that you “fit” with. A family that will be comfortable for you to work with and with whom you can communicate. When I am out on an interview there are some very specific things I watch for. Here are a few
§ Does the family make arrangements for the kids for the first interview? It is impossible to properly interview with kids in the room. You should have at least one interview where you can talk about employment issues like pay, vacation and such. Also, it is hard to discuss philosophy of childcare when kids are in the room. A family that knows this will understand that the relationship you have with your employers is as important as your relationship with the kids.
§ Does the family have another interview with time to interact with the kids? Chemistry is key. Never work for a family if you cannot connect with the kids. It won’t last.
§ Is the atmosphere of the home one that you are comfortable with? Are they impossibly neat? Are you? Are they undtidy? Will this drive you crazy? Look around for clues as to the way they keep their home. If you are a organizing demon and they have stacks of things everywhere this should be a red flag!
§ Can I talk to them? Many nannies- really most I think- are not that assertive when it comes to tough conversations. If I am nervous talking to them at an interview- I won’t be able to bring up that vacation time they owe me or the other rough things we have to talk about.
§ Are they looking for a nanny like me? Are they looking for someone to be there for a long time and I know I only want to work here for a year- not a good sign. Do they want someone who will check in with them often but I am used to being on my own for the day- again not a good fit.
§ Do they ask pertinent questions? Nothing like going to an interview and being asked questions from the interview guide book- what are your discipline philosophies? What was your parenting like as a child? Those questions are good- but serious families ask more in depth questions that follow up anwers that I have already given
§ Do they treat me as a professional? The only way to tell this is by the questions they ask and the tone of the interview. But if you are looking for it- you will know. Do they ask you childcare questions? Do they make sure you are paid legally? Do they offer the benefits you deseve?
Finding a family is a difficult process. But like I always tell mothers who ask for advice finding nannies- trust your gut. If you don’t feel a connection with the family move on. The relationship is a difficult one already!
-- Sue Downey
§ Does the family make arrangements for the kids for the first interview? It is impossible to properly interview with kids in the room. You should have at least one interview where you can talk about employment issues like pay, vacation and such. Also, it is hard to discuss philosophy of childcare when kids are in the room. A family that knows this will understand that the relationship you have with your employers is as important as your relationship with the kids.
§ Does the family have another interview with time to interact with the kids? Chemistry is key. Never work for a family if you cannot connect with the kids. It won’t last.
§ Is the atmosphere of the home one that you are comfortable with? Are they impossibly neat? Are you? Are they undtidy? Will this drive you crazy? Look around for clues as to the way they keep their home. If you are a organizing demon and they have stacks of things everywhere this should be a red flag!
§ Can I talk to them? Many nannies- really most I think- are not that assertive when it comes to tough conversations. If I am nervous talking to them at an interview- I won’t be able to bring up that vacation time they owe me or the other rough things we have to talk about.
§ Are they looking for a nanny like me? Are they looking for someone to be there for a long time and I know I only want to work here for a year- not a good sign. Do they want someone who will check in with them often but I am used to being on my own for the day- again not a good fit.
§ Do they ask pertinent questions? Nothing like going to an interview and being asked questions from the interview guide book- what are your discipline philosophies? What was your parenting like as a child? Those questions are good- but serious families ask more in depth questions that follow up anwers that I have already given
§ Do they treat me as a professional? The only way to tell this is by the questions they ask and the tone of the interview. But if you are looking for it- you will know. Do they ask you childcare questions? Do they make sure you are paid legally? Do they offer the benefits you deseve?
Finding a family is a difficult process. But like I always tell mothers who ask for advice finding nannies- trust your gut. If you don’t feel a connection with the family move on. The relationship is a difficult one already!
-- Sue Downey
Monday, November 05, 2007
Why nannies get fired-- a list
TOP 12 REASONS NANNIES ARE FIREDAnd who is responsible (contributed by nannies, parents, agency owners)
15. (Parent) Parent realizes that nanny care is more expensive than day care, and switches.
14. (Nanny) Listening to inappropriate music ( with violent, sexualized, or profane language), watching inappropriate television or using inappropriate language with the children.
13 (No fault, but could have been avoided with communication before job began) Nanny has lifestyle to which parents don’t want children exposed (religious differences, dating outside of race or inside of gender, wearing tattoos, etc.).
12. (Nanny) Showing lack of initiative and failure to plan age appropriate activities for the children
11. (Nanny) Showing lack of respect for employers’ home and property: Parents finding the house worse off than when they left to go to work, or live-in nanny keeping her room (and the house) dirty and messy.
10. (Nanny) Failure to bond with the children, sometimes including using yelling or other authoritative style that intimidates them.
9. (?) Nanny is in car accident, whether or not it is her fault, during her own time or during work hours, with or without children in the car.
8. (Nanny) Staying out and drinking and/or partying so late the night before, that nanny is unable to be alert and responsive to the children during her scheduled hours. (Live-in, usually)
7. (Nanny) Excessive on duty time spent on personal tasks such as internet surfing, telephone calls, television watching.
6. (Nanny) Failure to comply with parents expressed wishes on issues such as nutrition (feeding them fast food), discipline (undermining parents’ rules) and safety (using cell phone while driving, not using car seat, etc.). Also, failure to follow through on other issues the parents have talked with the nanny about.
5. (Nanny) "Threatening the Mom" by the nanny allowing the little ones to call her "Mommy", or through an "I'm a better mommy than you" attitude.
4 (Parent) Insecure mom, who has unresolved conflicts about letting someone else take care of her kids (the nanny is fired for being a great nanny and having a close relationship with the kids, or having any tiny flaw that the mother can use to believe she’s not good enough).
3. (Nanny) Being undependable: being habitually late or absent (even with notice) during scheduled work hours. (Parent) Or, nanny needing time off for surgery or recovery from an injury.
2, (Parent) Nanny giving generous notice about leaving the job, parent firing nanny immediately or well before notice period ends. (Parents often feel betrayed and vengeful when nannies plan to leave.)
1. (Nanny and Parent) Lack of communication, which leads to confusion about nanny duties and responsiblities, and any number of other issues.
compiled by Jan St Clair
15. (Parent) Parent realizes that nanny care is more expensive than day care, and switches.
14. (Nanny) Listening to inappropriate music ( with violent, sexualized, or profane language), watching inappropriate television or using inappropriate language with the children.
13 (No fault, but could have been avoided with communication before job began) Nanny has lifestyle to which parents don’t want children exposed (religious differences, dating outside of race or inside of gender, wearing tattoos, etc.).
12. (Nanny) Showing lack of initiative and failure to plan age appropriate activities for the children
11. (Nanny) Showing lack of respect for employers’ home and property: Parents finding the house worse off than when they left to go to work, or live-in nanny keeping her room (and the house) dirty and messy.
10. (Nanny) Failure to bond with the children, sometimes including using yelling or other authoritative style that intimidates them.
9. (?) Nanny is in car accident, whether or not it is her fault, during her own time or during work hours, with or without children in the car.
8. (Nanny) Staying out and drinking and/or partying so late the night before, that nanny is unable to be alert and responsive to the children during her scheduled hours. (Live-in, usually)
7. (Nanny) Excessive on duty time spent on personal tasks such as internet surfing, telephone calls, television watching.
6. (Nanny) Failure to comply with parents expressed wishes on issues such as nutrition (feeding them fast food), discipline (undermining parents’ rules) and safety (using cell phone while driving, not using car seat, etc.). Also, failure to follow through on other issues the parents have talked with the nanny about.
5. (Nanny) "Threatening the Mom" by the nanny allowing the little ones to call her "Mommy", or through an "I'm a better mommy than you" attitude.
4 (Parent) Insecure mom, who has unresolved conflicts about letting someone else take care of her kids (the nanny is fired for being a great nanny and having a close relationship with the kids, or having any tiny flaw that the mother can use to believe she’s not good enough).
3. (Nanny) Being undependable: being habitually late or absent (even with notice) during scheduled work hours. (Parent) Or, nanny needing time off for surgery or recovery from an injury.
2, (Parent) Nanny giving generous notice about leaving the job, parent firing nanny immediately or well before notice period ends. (Parents often feel betrayed and vengeful when nannies plan to leave.)
1. (Nanny and Parent) Lack of communication, which leads to confusion about nanny duties and responsiblities, and any number of other issues.
compiled by Jan St Clair
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Forbes Magazine article
Forbes magazine had this article Money To Be Maid - Forbes.com. In it they talk about with the increasing number of very wealthy people in the US, there are increasing larger salaries for the workers who care for those families. Personal assistants, housekeepers, estate managers and yes, NANNIES. This is no surprise! At Nannypalooza, our yearly conference, we had a session on being a $100,000 nanny. And while those jobs are not common, Jonathan Frye of the Lindquist Agency assured many in the session that there are quite a few $50-60,000 a year jobs for qualified candidates. This is great news for us! Now we just have to get everyone to pay their nannies legally!
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Nannypalooza
Last weekend was Nannypalooza o7- a fiesta of fun and learning. This conference provides training and networking to many and I am proud of it. It is still in its infancy. This year was only the second year. It really started with a dream of creating a place where nannies could get affordable classes. In college I learned of the value of conferences and seminars as continuing education. These kind of conferences are common in corporate America, and even in educational situations. But for nannies they are really only an option for the elite level nanny. INA (International Nanny Association) has a great conference but the fees to attend alone are well over $2oo dollars- not to mention hotel and travel. NAEYC has a great conference- better than any other early childhood one I think- but it is really geared toward preschool TEACHERS and doesn't have much specifically for nannies. And even NAEYC is more than $150 to attend. Nannypalooza is $75. It includes 3 meals. It includes 6 workshops. It will continue to be $75 for as long as we can keep it there- even if we have to make sacrifices to keep it that way. I am adamant about this. Why? Because if I had come to a conference like this in the first years of my nanny career, I would have been a better nanny. I would have been happier. I would have improved the lives of the families I worked for, and for the kids I loved. It makes a difference to have the conference experience. And even though the "vintage" nannies make up a good portion of the conference, I am beyond thrilled to think about the nannies who really need this education, connection and inspiration.
- Sue Downey
NANC
- Sue Downey
NANC
Thursday, September 06, 2007
Workers of the World Unite
Recently, this article was in the Washington Post. Nannies on a Quest for Rights - washingtonpost.com It highlights nannies who are searching for a decent living wage and benefits. This illustrates the diversity in our profession. In this same area of D.C. many "career" nannies are making $100,000 or more a year. I have such mixed feelings about this. On one hand, there are many nannies I know taking care of kids who work so hard for peanuts. They have no rights in our unregulated industry and because nannies are often nurturers instead of negotiators they are taken advantage of. On the other hand, I have seen nannies who are really not great caregivers get grossly inflated salaries because the demand for a certain type of nanny is high. And the sad but true thing is - that if you are white and speak English it is much easier to get a decent living wage. Does that make you a better caregiver? I don't think so. I dream of a day when our credential is up and running and there are some tangibles in our profession. Of course this does not mean that parents will pay on the books or stop looking for a "cheaper" nanny who will also clean the house.
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