Unleash Your Inner Safety Goddess
By Britt Michaelian, M.A.
Author of Secrets of the Safety Goddess:
A Modern Safety Guide for Busy Parents

Doesn't it just sound euphoric to think about unleashing your inner goddess? How about unleashing your inner Safety Goddess? Ok, well maybe not as euphoric, but still a pretty enticing idea, right?

Today, you are going to find out 5 things you can do to tap into your inner Safety Goddess. The good news is that she is inside every one of us, if we choose to tap into her. The trick is knowing how...

When a mother takes home her first baby from the hospital, she is sent home with some diapers, a blanket and usually a bag of goodies with such things as a sample of baby shampoo, a tube of diaper rash ointment and coupons for diapers.

Unfortunately, there is no instruction book that comes home with our new baby because every baby is different. If you are lucky, you may have a very hands-on grandmother to help you manage your little one. However, the reality is that no matter how much mother's intuition you are blessed with and no matter how wonderful a caregiver you can possibly be, safety knowledge is not something we are born with. It is learned. So, educating yourself about child safety now is essential.

With the #1 cause of death in children being preventable injuries, it is our job as loving parents to educate ourselves about potential hazards, safety precautions and preferred actions to take in an emergency, if we want to keep our little bambinos safe!

Here are 5 steps you can take right now to tap into safety bliss:

Safety Goddesses, unleash!

1. Take annual CPR and First Aid courses through the American Red Cross or the American Heart Association.
2. Childproof your child and your home. Make sure that your windows have guards and locks, safety gates are installed at stairways, electrical outlets are covered, chemicals and cosmetics are out of reach and all other hazards are corrected. Communicate with your child about things that are dangerous and use protective gear and helmets when participating in wheeled activities.
3. Install, test and utilize your smoke and carbon monoxide detectors on every level of your home.
4. Supervise your children with the 5/10 rule: Never let a child under 5 out of your site for longer than 5 seconds and never let a child be more than 10 feet away from you. Expand the time to 10/20 for children between 5 and 9 years old. Supervision is essential for children of all ages!
5. Read child safety books, watch safety videos and regularly educate yourself with the latest recall information and safety news.

Speaking from experience, once I started reading about child safety, I got addicted. There is simply no end to the information you can find that will help you be a prepared and informed caregiver. Safety is a topic that you can never know too much about because the world is always changing, which means safety is too!

Now that you have let your inner Safety Goddess out to play, tap into safety at least once a month. Sign up for my Safety Pop newsletter, check out the Consumer Product Safety Commission Recall list, test your smoke and carbon monoxide detectors and sign up for those CPR classes.

Then, keep the ball rolling on safety. Start with you and move on to your community. One great way to promote safety is to pass it along as a gift. For under $20, you can purchase a copy of Secrets of the Safety Goddess: A Modern Safety Guide for Busy Parents or Care for Kids: The Essential Guide to Preparing Caregivers on Amazon.com and give a meaningful gift to a parent, teacher or nanny. If we can spread the message about the Safety Goddess to all of our fellow parents and caregivers, our children will be safer at playdates, school and in life. Now that sounds euphoric!



To find out more about child safety, go to http://SafetyGoddess.com and http://ResponsibleFamily.com

Year End Bonus?

As 2008 draws to a close many things are on our to do lists. Gift to buy, parties to go to, thanks to many who make our lives manageable. Your child's caregivers and teachers are probably on that list. But this year, with the economy so uncertain, you may find you are cutting back on those year end envelopes of joy. 

Nannies- that is to be a little bit expected. But that doesn't lessen the sting. Much like the dad in the Christmas Vacation movie, many of us expect that holiday bonus. We count on it especially if we have been with a family for more than a year and have gotten a bonus in years past. And in these stressful times, a nanny is often working late, filling in when needed and offering to help out more than normal. When the holiday envelope doesn't arrive, or is less than expected, hurt feelings can ruin what has  been a great thing for everyone. 

SO what are you to do? My advice is to remember what a difference a nanny can make in your life and remember that communication is key. If you want to keep a great nanny, you should really make it a priority to show your appreciation. If you are cutting back across the board on all holiday spending, let your nanny know. Explain that these sacrifices must be made but you would like to show your appreciation in another way. Offer and extra day off, a few late mornings that you can calendar throughout the year, some frequent flier miles, or other bonuses that don't cost you much but will make a big differences to the nanny. Show that age old mantra we preach to the kids is true, it is the thought that counts. Find a creative way to show that you care. Most of all don't be afraid to talk to each other. If you can find a way to discuss these touchy subjects, it will make all the difference in how you weather these tough times. 

The toughest part of this is how we, as nannies react. It can be almost impossible to not notice that they are spending tens of thousands of dollars on expensive gifts but then ask you to not take a bonus. And all too often we are counting on the bonus to pay for our traveling or gifts for this season instead of it being a true "bonus". Talk to your family and let them know how you feel. Don't let resentment or anger build. And remember, unless it is written in your contract, a end of the year bonus is not promised, even if you have gotten one before. When you do get a bonus, make sure to appreciate that this year, more than ever, it really means a lot! 

Sue Downey

Why nanny care IS an affordable choice for some

With the economy crashing and people tightening belts, much has been made about the fact that nanny care is expensive. And it is. It is certainly more than putting one baby in day care. However, for some families nanny care is truly a value. If a family has 3 kids in day care, a nanny can actually be less expensive. And the care happens in your home, with no commute to a center before and after work. Flexibility is a crucial advantage of nanny care. Many working parents work long hours, often racing to gather kids as centers close. Also, coming home to kids as opposed to picking them up can make all the difference for moms and dads who look forward all day to spending time with their children. In today's economy many professionals work non traditional hours, making nanny care essential. In addition, nannies often lighten the load around the home. Most nannies are willing to help with a few non child related tasks, shopping, starting dinner, picking up dry cleaning etc.. 

Certainly, nanny care is not for everyone. But I hope that today's parents don't discount the option and the many benefits just because some think the price tag is high. I know plenty of moms who come home to dinner on the stove, kids coloring quietly and a friendly smile from someone who just wants to make life easier for the family. It is hard to put a price tag on that in any economy. 

Sue Downey

Is the economy affecting nannies and daycare centers?

I have to believe that, with a resounding Yes, they are. Childcare is probably one of the most expensive costs to families, and I have to think that especially for nanny care, which sometimes comes with the added expense of healthcare, mileage and gas money, and extras that are provided to nannies.

And another cost of nannies, which parents seem to slowly be catching onto? Household-employment taxes. People who pay household workers more than $1,600 a year are required to file the necessary paperwork, consisting of Medicare and Social Security taxes, unemployment insurance - federal and state - and other state and local taxes, and this is often a tedious process. But by escaping these taxes, some nannies may be losing out on services and a safety net, according to an article in the Wall Street Journal today about parents avoiding "the nanny tax." The cause of this is due, in part anyway, to huge growth of parents hiring nannies from internet sites. From the article:

In the past, parents more often hired full-time nannies through brick-and-mortar agencies, which often exerted armtwisting to persuade both parents and nannies to pay taxes...An estimated 30% to 50% of nanny hires are now done online, up from about 10% five years ago. In general, that may lead to "doing things a little more casually," says Monica Fleming, president of GoNannies.com, an employment site.


So it would seem that while using the internet to obtain a great, trusting nanny would be convienent and safe in today's world, it might actually be allowing for less tax revenue and a safety net for the nanny?

What do you think of this? How do you think nannies and/or childcare centers have been or will be affected by the economy?

-Katie Conrad

New book helps to keep kids safe!

At Nannypalooza this year we were very honored to have New York City child abuse and sex crimes prosecutor Jill Starishevsky come and speak to us. She also owns the website How'sMyNanny.com. Jill's mission in life is keeping kids safe, and specifically she wants to keep children safe from sexual predators. I learned quite a few things in her presentation, not the least of which was to never teach a child to keep "secrets" as this is the first thing a predator will use as a way to keep the abuse silent. (Use the word surprise instead.) 

Jill recently published a new, groundbreaking book that I believe will save kids' lives. It is called My Body Belongs to Me. This book is a poem that will help start the conversation about personal safety. It is very brave and amazing. The one part of the book that is very specific about abuse, that very gently, but very clearly explains to a child that it is not ok for someone to touch you in places your swimsuit covers, was the part of the book that publishers wanted her to change or delete. But Jill knows from her dedicated work with the city of New York that keeping kids in the dark will not protect them. Keeping secrets is not good for anyone when it comes to abuse. 

I strongly recommend checking this out! 

www.MyBodyBelongsToMe.com

NANC in the news

Nannypalooza got a mention on the Today Show on Oct. 30th. Watch the story here! 
The story is about affordable child care and parent's search for "Mary Poppins"

Niche Nannies

A Niche Nanny is a nanny who specializes in a type of care that is specific. For example, there are infant specialists who care for newborns. These nannies have special training, years of experience and a special talent for dealing with newborns and their parents. Infant Specialists often spend 24/7 with a family for the first few weeks of a baby's life in order to provide the best care for the whole family. There are many kinds of niche nannies. Nannies who specialize in care for autistic or special needs families for example. These nannies also have a wealth of training and experience. But even if your needs are more basic finding a nanny that has experience with twins, or a nanny who has experience dealing with divorce can make all the difference for you. 

This trend is great for nannies as it allows them to market themselves to families and makes them more employable. It also allows them to command higher salaries. It is great for families as it offers up nannies with more training and specialized knowledge that will help them meet their specific needs. 

The thing about any nanny situation is that it is most successful when the nanny and family have a good fit. When the nanny and family match needs, talents, temperaments, and personalities. In that sense every nanny is looking for his or her "niche". 

Sue Downey

Economic hard times for nannies

The news is hitting everyone. The economy is bad and things are tough. For nannies, whose income is tied to the income of others (the more a family makes the more they can afford to pay for childcare) the situation is not looking good. Recently there was this article in the Wall Street Journal Five Ways to Save on Child-Care Costs - WSJ.com. This article suggest nanny sharing as one way to get high quality care while not taking out a second mortgage on your home. It also talks about how to handle it if you have to cut your nanny's salary.

As a nanny who has worked for a family for more than 7 years I can't imagine what that conversation will feel like. "Yes, I need you to do the same job, work the same hours, and get paid less." However, my employer works in the financial industry and she is probably going to make less this year. She is working just as hard and just as many hours if not more! So I started thinking about it and here is how I would like the conversation to go. 

1. If you have to pay me less, or even give me less for bonuses and extras please tell me about it. Talking about these things is awkward but it does make it better in the long run. 

2. Make me a part of the team. If I know you are cutting corners then it will be easier for me to take the hit. 

3. If I am loyal now and take the pay cut with grace and dignity, please remember me later when things get better. 

4. If you have to cut back think of things you can do for your nanny that will help her weather the storm. Do you have internet she can use? Can you share frequent flier miles, credit card bonus points, or other perks that don't cost you a thing but that can mean everything to someone who may be living check to check? These things show that you care. And really that is what is important to convey. 

Sue Downey (nanny) 

Contracts between nannies and families

Should nannies and families sign contracts? Do you think they help in spelling out responsibilities and rules? Do they help with issues that may be brought up later - as in, just refer to the contract you've signed to work out a problem? Or should nannies and families play it by ear, see how things go and adjust as necessary?

I worked as a nanny for 1.5 years, and never signed a contract with the family. I was under the impression that we would sign one upon my starting, but it never happened. I never really thought much about it, because we had a great system going, and any issues that came up were addressed immediately. However, there was one important contract we both signed through the agency, and we didn't realize until months later the real problem with that.

The family used an agency to find me, and one day the mom and I were talking about that agency, and apparently we both got very different definitions of our "contract" from them. See, I was aware of a contract through the agency that found me, and I signed it because it was spelled out to me. The rule of that contract was that I was not to open a business like the nanny agency within 150 miles of her business. That was a very easy contract to sign as I knew that would never be an issue. The mom of the family I cared for was under the impression that the contract she and I both signed separately stated that I, as the nanny, would be responsible for paying the family's fee if I backed out of the position before our agreed-upon 1 year agreement was up.

While this never became an issue between the family and myself, as I stayed with them for longer than a year, it definitely clarified the use of contracts...MAKE SURE YOU BOTH SIGN THE SAME AGREEMENT!

Katie Conrad

Nannypalooza

Last weekend, Oct 4 and 5th, we held our third conference Nannypalooza. The idea behind this conference was to create a place where nannies of all levels could come and get training at an affordable price. AND that it could be fun and professional all at the same time. 

As nannies we know that by making learning fun more can be accomplished. Nannies are often very isolated in their positions. They can feel like they have little support and depending on their relationship with their employers, it is possible that they don't have any support. Bringing nannies together from all skill levels and from all geographic areas is so important for so many reasons. Supporting each other is one of the most crucial. 

The conference was once again a huge success, bringing together nannies of every level and agencies of every size to meet each other and learn. The sessions were overall very well received and the atmosphere was fun and welcoming. 

Next year we are looking to move the conference from the Philly area to another location. I hope we can continue to bring high quality content to nannies and agencies while having a good time. 

Posted by Sue Downey

The Nanny-Mother Relationship

Should a nanny be a part of the family or should she/he remain stricty business?

 

I have heard both ends of the spectrum on this issue. I had the pleasure of being immediately accepted as family when I first came to nanny. I was grateful for this because I was 1,200 miles from home and a little nervous. The family was very accommodating, allowing me to put my favored foods onto the grocery list and occassional personal items if necessary. I was also given gas money weekly, and wherever I took the kids I was given money or re-imbursed. The mother of the 3 fabulous kids also helped me find a doctor, dentist, pharmacist, and helped me switch my car and health insurance policies.

 

I worked for a very laid-back family, where it was even acceptable for me to take personal calls at the house or on my cell phone. I was given time to run errands during the business day if necessary, and occassionally a friend stopped by to play with the kids, or to pick up a forgotten item.

 

I cannot complain about the environment in which I worked. Actually, the fact that it was so laid back made me want to NOT endulge in those opportunities out of respect. I rarely accepted personal calls, unless from family, and I tried to make doctors and hair appointments on my day off or early in the morning. In the very beginning, when I did not know a soul in my new town, on my days off I would take the kids with me to discover the town. Our relationship worked very well because everything was laid out in the beginning. I did my job,  and thus few problems occurred. I still have a great relationship with the family for which I nannied, including the parents.

 

I have heard of some rough stories. And really, the media (remember The Nanny Diaries?) likes to play on the bad relationships between mothers and nannies. I think that if both parties really just concentrate on their number one priority - the children - the relationship works, whatever way it naturally flows. I have also heard, and I do think it is a common belief that there is a complete lack of communication between mothers and nannies, which can lead to jealousy and resentment.

 

What has been your experience? And is the media portrayal correct? How can mothers and nannies overcome problems?

 -- Katie Conrad

 

Nannies and Sick Days

 

Should nannies have paid sick days?

 

Most employees do, why shouldn't nannies? Isn't it pretty likely that nannies who get sick got it from one of the little ones? And if they didn't, who do you think will get it next? Nannies are employees too, and they do deserve sick days.

 

I saw a post awhile back on The Juggle, a Wall Street Journal blog about Nannies/Caregivers and paid sick days, and it really got me thinking. Most nannies, when using sick days, are truly sick and need the day off. I don't know that many nannies, but I don't image it's very common for nannies to abuse sick time. (Correct me if i'm wrong.) If they are abusing it, they should not be your nanny.

 

I don't remember how many sick days I used - one? two? - but I was certainly offered them, especially one time upon returning from the doctor's office and I was told to take a sick day (I must have looked pretty bad!) I just really think it is the right think to do - paid sick days should be available to everyone. Especially childcare providers.

 

Interestingly, out of over 60 comments on that post I read, only 3 comments came from nannies or former nannies. The rest were from parents who employ nannies, most of whom stated that they offer paid sick time in addition to decent salary and in some cases, vacation time. But I've heard some stories of nannies not being treated well at all.

 

Here is a link to the article- wall_street_journal_blog

Nannies, sound off.

---Katie Conrad

The Joys of Being a Nanny

The Joys of Being a Nanny

 

- When you are supervising homework time and she finally says, "I DID IT!" and beams as she shows you her work.

- When they were asked to draw a picture of the family and you are included in the drawing. (How sweet, right?)

- When you go to the driving range at the golf course and the kids are so much better than you that you don't have to try to let them win!

- When they leave you notes under your bedroom door because they missed you overnight.

- When they make an egg breakfast for you! And it tastes delicious!

- When they are able to show you how the science experiment works!

- When you take them trick-or-treating and after going through their stash of candy say, "you can have this Reese's Cup, I know they are your favorite" and you know that they will never have a problem sharing.

- When you walk in on them reading a book to their little sister and making the animal sounds in the book!

- When asked "what did you learn in school today?" and they say anything other than "nothing." **

- When they come home from school with an A+ test and thank you for helping them study.

-When you tuck them in at night and they give you a kiss and say they love you!

 

 

** Nannies, if you don't already, ask your charges "what did you learn in school today?" after school each day. I found that it makes them think about what they did and gets them talking about school after the bell rings. Most of the time they will remember this stuff too, so you are helping them retain their knowledge.

 

What are your joys of being a nanny?

 --Katie Conrad

 

New Kid on the Block!

New Kid on the Block!

 

Let me begin by saying that I am not a veteran nanny. I have 2 years experience as an actual nanny, but over 12 years of experience in childcare - babysitting, coaching, tutoring, mentoring - and that by no means qualifies me as an expert.

 

I do however, think it qualifies me to lead discussions on nannies and nanny experiences. When I was asked the common question "so, what do you do?" and my response was "I'm a nanny," I rarely got anything else. I think people thought that by being a nanny I didn't have experience in any other field, or that I couldn't hold a conversation with someone who works outside the home. Has anyone else felt that they were instantly judged for being a nanny, as opposed to just being a babysitter? It is my hope that we can shed some light on being a nanny, sharing our experiences and concerns, and in the process, emphasize the important role of a nanny, and the lasting impact they leave on children and families.

 

My nanny job was quite rare in that I cared for 2 elementary aged kids and one toddler with a severe disability. A disability that produces daily seizures. One that has not given her the ability to walk or talk. One that gave her severe acid reflux and minimal motor skills, so she now eats via feeding tube. One that has left her with cortical vision impairment, meaning no one knows what or how much she can actually see. But still, she was the cutest little girl in the world, and she taught me a few things.

-- Posted by our new blog guru- Katie